I think by the time you are 50, you’ve made most of your friends. You have friends from grade school, high school (of course!), college, work and those you pick up along the way through your kids’ activities. Four years ago, with some reluctance, I went to a happy hour a friend pulled together. She wanted to introduce me to someone she thought could be a new friend. Driving over to Sasha’s on DeMun, I thought: One drink and I am outta there. I have plenty of friends, I don’t need any new ones. And that’s where I met Raschelle, my Backtalk writing partner.
On paper, we are complete opposites. She has an amazing, high-powered job; I had an amazing job but now stay home and write funny columns. Raschelle is not from here and has lived all over the country; I’ve lived within the same 5 miles for 56 years. Raschelle is a single mother with two kids; I have two kids, but also a husband of 33 years (and two dogs). With our differences, we should not get along. And if you read our column, you know we don’t agree on much, but from that night on, we became fast friends.
That night there were several groups of sisters among us, so I announced that Raschelle and I would be sisters. If you take a look at our picture, that would be genetically impossible—my Irish freckles and red hair hardly match her brunette beauty. Almost immediately I started calling her Hoda and myself Kathie Lee, because I thought we were that funny together (even after only one cocktail, honest). To say we clicked was an understatement.
Raschelle quickly entered my world, spending ‘eye-opening’ holidays with my large extended family and taking trips where I made her order bottles of wine and potato chips from room service. And both of us took it seriously when the other suggested we could make tons of money by starting a jam-making business (or other ‘surefire scheme’) that would be featured on QVC.
Now that I have finally explained to her certain nuances of St. Louis (like why people care about where you went to high school, that Highway 40 is Highway 64, that yes, the 1904 World’s Fair was a big deal, and that everyone is related to everyone in St. Louis—or at the very least grew up with their cousin), Raschelle is leaving. And I have to say good bye.
Our last Backtalk column has been written, her house is on the market, and the weekend for the big drive across the country to Boston has been circled on the calendar. I’ve not had many friends move away. People seem to stay once they get here, so this whole friendship-at-a-distance is new to me. And to say it has me rattled is an understatement.
I’m sorry if this week’s column is low on laughs, but Hoda and Kathie Lee are splitting up, and while I realize you might miss the Backtalk column (though I hope you never used it for advice, but just for laughs), I am going to miss my pal. Safe travels, Hoda. And just know Kathie Lee will always be right here in St. Louis if you need her. And remember, if someone ever asks you to come meet a new friend, do it. You just might meet your Hoda.
Contact Patty at phannum@townandstyle.com.