raven: The nonprofit works to foster peaceful relationships and communities by increasing self-awareness, challenging abuse and control, teaching alternative behaviors and promoting personal responsibility.
[corporate hero]
Raven applauds Husch Blackwell for providing free legal services to victims of domestic violence.
[meet joe eulberg of st. louis county]
Q| How long have you been a volunteer?
A| I began volunteering in 2002; I ended up retiring a year earlier than I thought and had plenty of free time. I started out facilitating a Saturday morning group.
Q| What made you interested in this particular cause?
A| I had been violent with my wife Barbara and over a period of years, my outbursts of violent behavior became more frequent and more serious. She finally said if I didn’t get help, she would leave with the kids, and she gave me Raven’s phone number. I was aware of the organization through my work as a probation officer earlier in my career. It was hard for me to go, but it turned out to be absolutely the best thing that could have happened. I wouldn’t have gotten better or learned tools to help me if I hadn’t gone to Raven. My lesson that I teach to these men is that you can stop. You might feel like you’re out of control, but you’re not. You’re the one choosing violence. But you first have to believe you can do it.
Q| What kind of volunteer work are you involved with?
A| I co-facilitate groups that are part of our 32-week program the men are required to complete. Our attendees often are referred by the court, so we’re always pleased when someone comes in on his own. I definitely use the fact that I’m a past perpetrator to relate to them. The groups are ongoing, so they include men who have been there a while and new ones, which helps the dynamic. All you need is one or two who will speak up and challenge the others. That’s what really makes it work. I also do an occasional speaking opportunity, like at local high schools and on the news, to share my story.
Q| If you could do anything for the organization, what would it be?
A| I would want more men who are being violent in relationships to reach out and get help from Raven. Approximately one out of four women will be physically harmed by a partner in their lifetime. That means all of us know someone who is affected by this; it’s just often well-hidden. At the worst of my violence, no one knew what I was doing to Barbara. But now, we’ve been married 43 years. You can literally save a life by giving out Raven’s phone number.
In the Words of Raven: “Joe is walking proof that people can change. He is quick to explain to our clients that they are not bad people; they have made bad choices, but they can make empowering, constructive choices moving forward. He inspires our men to be better people, to contribute meaningfully to their families and communities. ”
[meet the raven board]
Seated: President Seth Hicks, Joe Eulberg, Carey DeLargy
Standing: Karen Stewart, Christine Hustedde, Chirstina Holmes, Jami Ake, Blake Fuhler
[Know a standout volunteer? Nominate them to be featured at townandstyle.com/reachingoutawards or email tellus@townandstyle.com for more information.]
Photo: Colin Miller of Strauss Peyton