Like many, I still count those I went to high school with as friends. And while I would rather not relive most of the lame-brained things we did for entertainment, there are a few worth repeating. One was spring break in Daytona Beach with Nerinx Hall teachers as chaperones (the first and last time that trip was allowed) and a camping trip with my pals on the Meramec River. So last year, we decided to go camping again. If you are a regular reader, you know this is a bad idea for a few reasons.

First, I really don’t like the outdoors. I like looking at it from the window. The outdoors is full of crazy animals and insects that at any moment can strike and kill you. I’m not kidding. I once saw a snake at Queeny Park and have never been back! Second, I like comfort. I love nice sheets and a full-sized bathroom. Go ahead, roll your eyes, but at least I’m honest! I do think this has something to do with my childhood, when I always had to share a room and  our family vacations consisted of float trips down the Current River while my four brothers terrorized me. (Yes, I just managed to throw my family under the bus for my own spoiled behavior.)

Our first planned weekend was cancelled due to flooding on the Meramec. And no, I had nothing to do with the torrential downpours that caused it. If only I had that much power. We rescheduled for the fall and this time, instead of staying in tents, we were going in an RV. It would be three of us. To protect their privacy, I will refer to my companions as Lucy and Ethel. Because they could tell I was waffling, we changed locations and decided to go to Hermann to drink wine and camp. That seemed a bit more appealing.

So off we went, Ethel driving the RV with Lucy as the navigator. Panic set in when Ethel announced it was only the second time she had driven an RV and she hoped she wouldn’t crash into a tree like she did on our first camping trip back in 1976. (If she did, at least we wouldn’t have to call her mother this time.) You might say Ethel is a real optimist. We arrived at Hermann Park to find all the RV slots with lovely views and landscaped lots already taken. But, alas, we were in luck! We could still hitch the RV in the big concrete parking lot right next to the tennis court.

Hermann offers a trolley service that drives you to the various wineries, so off we went for a day of wine and laughter. I can’t drink wine because of my migraines, so I drank beer. Ethel lost her wallet at some point, and Lucy had some really bad food allergy issues, so by 5 p.m., we were done. We returned to the parking lot and built a fire, but when it seemed to be growing, we put it out and used the barbecue grill as a fire pit. We were quickly bored being outside so we headed into the luxury RV, where we watched La La Land, ate junk food, laughed at each other and fell asleep by 9:30. And that’s how I like to camp! I only spent about 45 minutes outside. So start planning your camping trip now with your own Ethel and Lucy. Making memories at 58 is just as much fun as doing it at 16.

Contact Patty at phannum@townandstyle.com.