I have writer’s glut. I have lots of things I want to write, but I’m not sure anyone wants to read them. Like I have a great story about my first time hunting and firing a gun, but with everything going on in the world, the last thing you probably want to hear is about my introduction to firearms. And I had a great column about cyberchondria, you know, when you spend too much time on the internet looking up your mysterious symptoms? Then I ended up in the doctor’s office, so I didn’t want to tempt fate.
So for the first time I don’t have words, I mean, the right words. But as I was getting ready to head out to Chesterfield Valley for cryotherapy (a story for another day), I ran across an article about people who like inspirational quotes on Facebook. It claimed they are less intelligent than people who don’t. (Uh-oh!) This morning I liked the following: “Life is too short for fake butter, cheese and people,” all of which is very true. I can’t stand the taste of margarine or ‘I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter.’ Fake cheese, yuck— unless of course it’s Cheez Whiz, and then I do make an exception if it is squirted on Ritz crackers.
As for fake people, now let me be clear: I don’t have a problem with anyone who has had a little nip or tuck, and even a filler or a bit of Botox. But fake happiness I can’t stand. If you are grumpy, just own it. According to the Daily Beast, a new study undertaken by the University of Waterloo in Ontario surveyed nearly 300 students for their reactions to so-called meaningful statements, which were in fact nonsensical lines made up of buzzwords. The students were asked to rate these statements. Those who scored the buzzword higher had lower cognitive abilities and intelligence. They also had less verbal fluidity and the ability to be reflective. Hmm.
What we don’t know is anything about the 300 students they surveyed. Having a college student myself, I am not sure how you can control for all the variables that exist. Did these students eat breakfast? And if so, was it more than day-old pizza or Fruit Loops? Did they sleep the night before? Were the students being paid for the study, and how many of them used the study as an opportunity to just fill in the bubbles on the sheet to form a pretty picture instead of answering the questions honestly? Or perhaps I was just reacting to the fact that a study just told me I wasn’t as smart as someone else because I clicked the ‘like’ button on a Facebook quote.
So since this is a family newspaper, I can’t tell you what I suggest the authors do with their study. I will continue to like quotes on Facebook because while some may see them as trite and nonsensical, I like them. And I will leave you with this: If the path before you is clear, you’re probably on someone’s else’s.
I love hearing from my readers, so feel free to email me at phannum@townandstyle.com
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