Patty Unleashed

Patty Unleashed: 8.11.21

During the pandemic, I signed up for quite a few inspirational newsletters. It was a mistake, and I spent the last few months unsubscribing. As I have mentioned before, I’m a glass half-empty kind of person, and their positivity rubbed me the wrong way. (The working title of my first book is Will Anyone Show Up To My Funeral?) But for some reason, I didn’t unsubscribe from the daily email Inspiring Quotes.  Most of the quotes were actually pretty helpful, well until they weren’t. I have no idea if another writer is in charge, but now, we get a quote and an explanation of what it means. A recent quote: Seek first the virtues of the mind and other things either will come, or will not be wanted. Hmm.

Normally, I would have just deleted it and moved on, but I read the explanation and am more confused than I was before. I am convinced this writer is just messing with the readers and trying to confuse people first thing in the morning. As a result, I refuse to unsubscribe. I keep reading the quotes and explanations even though they don’t make sense. This writer can’t mess with me! But it did get me thinking about the odd things people say that we seem to just accept as reasonable.

Don’t worry, be happy. I suffer from OCD and anxiety. I take medication for both. If I had a dollar for every time someone said this to me, well, I am pretty sure my medication would be covered. This is not helpful. Saying this will not suddenly cause someone to stop worrying and start dancing in the street. It may, however, cause them to punch you in the face.

Giving 110% OK, you can’t. It’s impossible.

Good things come to those who wait. Clearly the person who first said this was not a parent! Can you imagine telling your child: Just sit there on the sofa honey. I’m certain someone is going to call you for a job!

Rules are made to be broken. As a rule follower, every time I hear this, I want to scream! Rules help us from running into each other when we drive, make sure we pay our fair share of taxes, keep us from taking each other’s belongings. No rules would mean chaos, people! Now, I do agree that some rules need to be changed since they are absurd, but there is a way to do that.

Money can’t buy happiness. While I agree that not all rich people are happy, let me just say, life is much easier with money in the bank. Money can provide security, and that makes you happy.

It takes 65 muscles to frown and 13 to smile. Why work overtime? Oh dear, where do I start with this one? I have resting b***h face (RBF). Since I was 30, I have looked angry. No amount of Botox or fillers can turn my frown upside down. So, no matter how many times someone tells me to “smile, it can’t be that bad!” my 13 muscles refuse to work. The 65 just like to show off.

I will continue to get the Inspiring Quotes email and read it every morning. At some point, I will unsubscribe, but not until I am sure I’m not being pranked.

Peace, my Peeps.


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