Patty Unleashed

Patty Unleashed: 2.12.20

I feel like the last few columns have been all about me. I know my name is at the top, but aren’t you getting a little bored with my stories? So this week, I’ve decided to give you my opinion about things going on in the world. You know, like an editorial writer from a major newspaper would … although I’m certain none of them would touch the topics I am about to discuss.

Jen and Brad: I am a fan girl when it comes to Brad Pitt. Who isn’t, since he’s from Springfield, Missouri, and each of us wonders why we couldn’t have gone to high school with him? But Brad, you blew it. You cheated on Jen, and she is never going to take you back. We saw how you looked at her at the SAG Awards, how you held her hand to your heart but she just kept walking. That’s right, she was walking away from you. As much as she may want to give everyone a fairytale ending, she’s no dummy. That girl doesn’t need you. Bye bye, Brad.

Meghan and Harry: Does anyone else think Harry has been planning his escape from the monarchy for a very long time? Don’t we all remember him as a 12-year-old walking behind his mother’s casket? He had years of misbehaving, but then served his country for 10 years in the armed services, including two tours in Afghanistan. I am quite sure the Queen could have gotten him out of any service requirement, or at the very least made sure he was never in an active war zone. But that’s not how Harry rolls. So when his wife starts being mistreated by the paparazzi and racial comments are made, he releases a statement saying he’s out of there, but fails to mention it to the Queen … who then tells Harry to come back to the UK. Harry does for about 48 hours, but now he is living where his family can be happy. Harry, you might not be allowed to be called Prince Harry anymore, but you will always be a prince to me.

Impeachment Hearings: The Watergate hearings had John Dean, and more importantly, his wife, who sat stoically behind him during his testimony looking like she just stepped out of Vogue. Clinton’s impeachment hearing had the rather salacious Ken Starr report and a blue dress from Gap. The current hearing doesn’t have any ‘hook,’ and as a result, people aren’t paying attention. I think a neon sign should be attached to the speaker’s platform and every time someone doesn’t tell the truth, the word ‘liar’ would light up. No more “I misspoke,” “You misunderstood me,” “I can’t recall.” Just call it what it is: a lie. There’s the hook! Daniel Dale, a Canadian journalist, follows our elected officials and lists the mistruths uttered on Twitter (@ddale8). Follow him. Follow the hearings. I know many people are only focused on the economy, but there are so many other things that need our attention.

All opinions expressed here are my own. Town&Style is not responsible for my words.

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