Patty Unleashed

Patty Unleashed: 5.18.22

I’ve not had a cohesive thought for a full column in weeks, so instead you get four mini ones!

The birds. While we were away in Florida, a robin built a nest in a wreath on our back door. The robin promptly laid eggs and became very protective of the nest. The eggs hatched, and now, I can see baby birds from the back door. The problem? I can no longer use my back door because it will become a scene from The Birds with me as Tippi Hedren. Interestingly, Stella and Stanley, our two dogs and the most likely of all of us to do the baby birds harm, are allowed access in and out of the door with no attack. Anyone know how long before these baby birds will leave the nest? I just want to use my back door without getting ambushed. I know it is not a hawk, but robins can be scary too!

Am I a cheater? I love playing Wordle. Let me rephrase. I love playing until I get to my fourth try and still don’t have the answer. So, that’s when I turn to Google for help. Am I cheating if I use Google to find five letter words that end with ‘rty?’ Or is it the same thing as looking at the Scrabble dictionary between turns? I hate to lose, but somehow when I win with the help of Google, it feels a little dirty. Thoughts?

I am a crazy book lady. As I mentioned in a previous column, I installed a Free Little Library in front of my house. We had so many visitors, I decided to install a second one just for children’s books since those seemed to turn over especially fast. If you aren’t familiar with Free Little Libraries, the idea is simple: People take a book and replace it with another, so it’s a self-sustaining resource. My two libraries are slowly but surely getting there! I LOVE books. Reading and commenting on Twitter are my only hobbies! Right now, I spend far too much time organizing the books in the two little libraries and then watching people walk by my house. First, I get peeved at the walkers that don’t even stop and look at the books. What is wrong with you? Don’t you want to read? Then, I get really upset when someone looks at the books and DOESN’T take one. It is all I can do not to run outside and ask them what title they are looking for so I can recommend a similar one. The best is when someone actually takes a book. I want to shout out, “You will love that one!” As you can see there are several issues here. First, why am I staring out the windows so much? And second, why am I taking a stranger’s actions so personally? I don’t really need your thoughts on this one. I think this is best left for my therapist.

My husband’s driving. I heard from a few of you regarding the article about my husband’s driving, wondering if it upset him. No, it did not because he read it before I submitted it—I am pretty clever after 39 years of marriage. And to be honest, my husband often ‘forgets’ to read my column unless I hand it to him and say, “aren’t I funny?” He always says yes. He too has been married for 39 years.

Peace my Peeps


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